I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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