I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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