why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
