she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out