Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
