why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
