Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
