yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
He called his prostate his "boner button".
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Randomize