i permit you to call me
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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