We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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