have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
