I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
