He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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