I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize