So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
