your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
