he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Randomize
