..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
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I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
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Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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