Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
23 Absolutely Despicable Things That People Have Actually Done
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.