I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Randomize
