I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
