Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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