We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
