I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
