He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
