Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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