Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
