I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
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