He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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