I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
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It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
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Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
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