Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
