I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
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