He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
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