Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.