If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
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