i already hear my dad disowning me
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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