sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
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