It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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