Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
