Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
