operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize