Me too!
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize