I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
