I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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