The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
