sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.