Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize