If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
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His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
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After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Randomize