You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
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