How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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