was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
